I am a person who is more occupied with my future plans rather than my current ones. I've always been the kind who looks ahead. And I like to have everything planned out. I wanna be in the know. What's going to happen after this year? "This is what's going to happen... " is what I would like to tell myself. But the truth is, I don't know. I haven't a clue what's going to happen. I can keep planning and figuring everything out for myself. In the end, I'm not the one who determines it.
There's the past, the present and the future. The past is real and it's always gonna be there. The present is the past rushing into the future; the point where both meet - now. And the future is what it is: some great unknown. Our lives are made up of the past, the present and the future. Equal attention must be paid to all three. Learn from the past. Live in the present. Hope in the future.
We spend a lot of time focused on the future, planning it, working toward it. But at some point you start to realize your life is happening now. Not after school, not after college, right now. This is it. It’s here. Blink and you’ll miss it. Did you say it? "You changed my life." "I love you." "I'll always remember you." All you wanted to say. Did you do it? Smile. Laugh. Cry. All you wanted to do. Make a plan. Set a goal. Work toward it, but every now and then, look around. Drink it in 'cause this is it. It might all be gone tomorrow.
You Could Be...
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"You ever look at a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background? It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other people's life have we been in. Were we somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise? Just think, you could be a big part of someone else's life, and not even know it." - Lucas Scott, One Tree Hill
I have only lived for 17 years. I cannot claim to have been through much. Or that my eyes have seen a lot. Or that my heart has felt more than it has. But I have been through things. And my heart has felt a myriad of emotions. It has felt pain, disappointment, regret, confusion, despair and it has also felt love, hope, delight, gratitude, faith.
The quote above made me think. I may only be 17. But there is a lot in those years. Many people have crossed my path. And I have crossed many people's paths. I have been in and out of people's lives. You may not know me. But if you do, I hope that I have, in a way, impacted your life. That you are glad that we know each other. I don't want to be just another person to you. I want to be someone you remember.
I believe that everyone hopes that when they come to the end of their lives on earth, they may be able to say that they have been the best version of themselves and have been able to touch the lives of the people around them. You don't have to change someone's life. You only have to cause a slight ripple, make their lives a little brighter, give them a reason to keep on keeping on. Cause that's what life is about. People. They are all that matters. The people who were in your life and who are in your life; they're not just there by chance. There is a reason why they are there. Of all the people in the world, what are the chances that you would know the people you know right now? So be the best person that you can be to everyone who crosses your path. Cause you could be a big part of someone else's life, and it doesn't matter if you know it or you don't. Just as long as you know that you have been the best version of you.
I have only lived for 17 years. I cannot claim to have been through much. Or that my eyes have seen a lot. Or that my heart has felt more than it has. But I have been through things. And my heart has felt a myriad of emotions. It has felt pain, disappointment, regret, confusion, despair and it has also felt love, hope, delight, gratitude, faith.
The quote above made me think. I may only be 17. But there is a lot in those years. Many people have crossed my path. And I have crossed many people's paths. I have been in and out of people's lives. You may not know me. But if you do, I hope that I have, in a way, impacted your life. That you are glad that we know each other. I don't want to be just another person to you. I want to be someone you remember.
I believe that everyone hopes that when they come to the end of their lives on earth, they may be able to say that they have been the best version of themselves and have been able to touch the lives of the people around them. You don't have to change someone's life. You only have to cause a slight ripple, make their lives a little brighter, give them a reason to keep on keeping on. Cause that's what life is about. People. They are all that matters. The people who were in your life and who are in your life; they're not just there by chance. There is a reason why they are there. Of all the people in the world, what are the chances that you would know the people you know right now? So be the best person that you can be to everyone who crosses your path. Cause you could be a big part of someone else's life, and it doesn't matter if you know it or you don't. Just as long as you know that you have been the best version of you.
6 Reasons Why I Like SPM
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These are 6 reasons why I like SPM:
1) My family treats me strangely extremely well. Especially Jo and my elder brother, Jack. They always hug me when I get back from school and ask me how were my papers. "Hi Che. *Open arms." "Hey girl. *Open arms*" Haha. And Mum's really nice. Waking up early every morning just to see me off although she needn't because Melia picks me up. And Dad's also all about the hugs. "Hi Mandy. *Open arms* How were the papers?" I feel so pampered. Lol!
2) I get to experience You. It's been three days of SPM already. And thank God, my papers so far have been fine. I am not worried or anxious about it because I am so sure that all the answers were not from me. They were all from You. I didn't do anything at all. Hehe. That's how I want it to be. Nothing done in my strength. Nothing at all. Besides, who better to commit my papers to than the One who created all these in the first place? *Grins* And oh, You have been so faithful, so faithful! I can't tell You how much I love You but I hope that when You look at my heart, You'll know it's so full of love for You for everything You are to me.
3) Supportive friends. It's so nice to have this big group of friends. That means me, Jessica, Yoke Pei, Nette, Melia, Su Vien, Iri, Angel, Hannah... We always pray before every single paper. And when I'm done, I'll always go to meet Jessica, YP and Nette before leaving the hall. Then us and the others will leave school together. And I like the fact that we usually just relax before every paper, then we just commit everything to God before we go into the hall. And we don't discuss the paper. If we do, we discuss how we felt about it. And I know that I can always whine if my paper didn't go as well as I hoped and they would always be able to tell me something to make me feel better. Haha.
4) The fantastic atmosphere. I'm really into quietness and solitude. I am a loud person. Haha. But I have my silent times too. And what I like about SPM is that it's so serious so it makes me really serious too. Haha. You see, everytime I sit for exams or tests, I'm really serious. You can go as far as saying that I'm a different person in the exam hall cause I don't seem to know anyone else. When I'm done, I usually just look around at stuff or outside, but never at people. That's just how I approach exams and tests. Lol. I'm weird so you shouldn't be surprised. And I just love the feeling of sitting in the hall with all these invigilators walking around you. And I really love the fact that they're super exact about the time. Only the moment the long hand ticks past 12 then nie they let you start. Ooh, and the History Section B was really fun to tear out. Haha. Although I made a lot of noise. I was just trying to be quiet actually. Lol.
5) It only happens once in a lifetime. I always feel that I should treasure everything that I experience in life. And as a student, that includes exams. Which is why I'm really gonna miss SPM. I was excited when it started. But it's passing by so quickly I'm afraid that I'm losing the chance to cherish it. Haha. It's like SPM is going way too fast. Don't think about the results or having to study and all that, just look at it as an experience. One that you'll only ever have once. Unless you resit in the middle of 2010. Lol.
6) This is my last chance to be a student before it's gone forever. I just realized this today. Cause Mum said something like, "After SPM you'll be out of school forever. You can't be together with your friends anymore. You're all going different ways." Then I became all =(. Sentimental me. Lol. And what my mum said sounded so darn sad. Can't be together anymore. Haha. But it's true. I'll never walk these grounds and feel so comfortable. The next time I set foot in MGS, it'll be like, "Alah. Mana office tu ah?" And with my bad memory, that is so possible. Haha.
1) My family treats me strangely extremely well. Especially Jo and my elder brother, Jack. They always hug me when I get back from school and ask me how were my papers. "Hi Che. *Open arms." "Hey girl. *Open arms*" Haha. And Mum's really nice. Waking up early every morning just to see me off although she needn't because Melia picks me up. And Dad's also all about the hugs. "Hi Mandy. *Open arms* How were the papers?" I feel so pampered. Lol!
2) I get to experience You. It's been three days of SPM already. And thank God, my papers so far have been fine. I am not worried or anxious about it because I am so sure that all the answers were not from me. They were all from You. I didn't do anything at all. Hehe. That's how I want it to be. Nothing done in my strength. Nothing at all. Besides, who better to commit my papers to than the One who created all these in the first place? *Grins* And oh, You have been so faithful, so faithful! I can't tell You how much I love You but I hope that when You look at my heart, You'll know it's so full of love for You for everything You are to me.
3) Supportive friends. It's so nice to have this big group of friends. That means me, Jessica, Yoke Pei, Nette, Melia, Su Vien, Iri, Angel, Hannah... We always pray before every single paper. And when I'm done, I'll always go to meet Jessica, YP and Nette before leaving the hall. Then us and the others will leave school together. And I like the fact that we usually just relax before every paper, then we just commit everything to God before we go into the hall. And we don't discuss the paper. If we do, we discuss how we felt about it. And I know that I can always whine if my paper didn't go as well as I hoped and they would always be able to tell me something to make me feel better. Haha.
4) The fantastic atmosphere. I'm really into quietness and solitude. I am a loud person. Haha. But I have my silent times too. And what I like about SPM is that it's so serious so it makes me really serious too. Haha. You see, everytime I sit for exams or tests, I'm really serious. You can go as far as saying that I'm a different person in the exam hall cause I don't seem to know anyone else. When I'm done, I usually just look around at stuff or outside, but never at people. That's just how I approach exams and tests. Lol. I'm weird so you shouldn't be surprised. And I just love the feeling of sitting in the hall with all these invigilators walking around you. And I really love the fact that they're super exact about the time. Only the moment the long hand ticks past 12 then nie they let you start. Ooh, and the History Section B was really fun to tear out. Haha. Although I made a lot of noise. I was just trying to be quiet actually. Lol.
5) It only happens once in a lifetime. I always feel that I should treasure everything that I experience in life. And as a student, that includes exams. Which is why I'm really gonna miss SPM. I was excited when it started. But it's passing by so quickly I'm afraid that I'm losing the chance to cherish it. Haha. It's like SPM is going way too fast. Don't think about the results or having to study and all that, just look at it as an experience. One that you'll only ever have once. Unless you resit in the middle of 2010. Lol.
6) This is my last chance to be a student before it's gone forever. I just realized this today. Cause Mum said something like, "After SPM you'll be out of school forever. You can't be together with your friends anymore. You're all going different ways." Then I became all =(. Sentimental me. Lol. And what my mum said sounded so darn sad. Can't be together anymore. Haha. But it's true. I'll never walk these grounds and feel so comfortable. The next time I set foot in MGS, it'll be like, "Alah. Mana office tu ah?" And with my bad memory, that is so possible. Haha.
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Leonard: Stars are pretty, aren't they?
Howard: Up above the world so high, like little diamonds in the sky.
Raj: That's beautiful, dude. You should write that down before someone steals it.
Howard: Up above the world so high, like little diamonds in the sky.
Raj: That's beautiful, dude. You should write that down before someone steals it.
- The Big Bang Theory, Season 3
S P M
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SPM 2009 begins tomorrow. The whole year of studying has been for these next four weeks. Wow. It's here. Haha. It's actually here. And I think I'm prepared. I'll go into the hall with guns (pens and 2B pencils XD) blazing. Lol. I never thought about how I would be in the days counting down to this major examination. But strangely enough, as I mentioned in my previous post, I am at peace. I thank You so much for being all I need, all I've ever needed and all I'll ever need. With You, I can say with absolute confidence, "I'm OK and I'll be OK." So when I begin this 10-day adventure tomorrow, I know You'll come along with me. Just me and You in a quiet hall. We'll have fun, yes? =]
"Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
But I trust in the name of the Lord my GOD!"
Psalm 20:7
But I trust in the name of the Lord my GOD!"
Psalm 20:7
Hi, I'm BA029A003
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I went to school today to arrange the places and do other stuff for SPM. The school held some motivational programme (or they thought it was motivational cause it wasn't for me; I prefer the motivational programme held when I was sitting for PMR 2007) before break. During break, I got to meet Puan Giam. Angel saw her actually, then she told me and we both ran to meet her. Then she said this to me in Hokkien: "Ah neh sui cha boh," or something like that. Lol. I dunno whether I wrote it correctly or if some words are wrong. Haha. But that's just how it sounded to me. She wished me and Angel all the best and God bless.
After break, they divided the students and sent most of the classes to the other classrooms. Only 5D, 5S and 5P students remained in the hall. So I had to find a table for myself. I got a pretty stable one. Everyone else was wetting and wiping their tables. I didn't have to do that cause my table was surprisingly extremely clean. Hehe. And I got my favourite gray chair. Oh, and I'm sitting beside Usha. What a surprise. I thought maybe I'd be sitting beside Ciuyi. Then Angel's behind me and Melia and Su Vien are pretty close by. It's too bad that Jessica, YP and Nette are damn far from me.
So anyway, I am sitting in the first row on the left, third table from the front. It's a pretty nice place. I'm satisfied =D I sit right beside the open doors, so I get a cool windy breeze every once in awhile. And of course, I sit so in front so I get to see the huge clock that ticks away the minutes until SPM ends for me =)
Then I got my SPM slip, which I call my SPM receipt because it actually has some price at the bottom. It doesn't look as nice as the one that I got for PMR. And then I got my sijil berhenti too. Nice blue paper. Haha. Ah. With all these official documents presented to me already and a table with my name on it in the MGS hall, all that's left is for me to actually sit for the exam. I'm not feeling stressed now. I've been stressed the whole year, but it's strange how when it actually comes to the moment, I feel an indescribable peace. Now I know that I had to go through all that stress to know that the peace I feel now comes from You and You alone. =] Oh, and before I left the hall today, I turned to my table, tapped it and said, "I'll see you Wednesday. Be nice to me." Haha.
One order of the SPM 2009 exam. RM163.50, please? XD
Effective after 8th December =D
My place for the next four weeks
Study, study, study =)
After break, they divided the students and sent most of the classes to the other classrooms. Only 5D, 5S and 5P students remained in the hall. So I had to find a table for myself. I got a pretty stable one. Everyone else was wetting and wiping their tables. I didn't have to do that cause my table was surprisingly extremely clean. Hehe. And I got my favourite gray chair. Oh, and I'm sitting beside Usha. What a surprise. I thought maybe I'd be sitting beside Ciuyi. Then Angel's behind me and Melia and Su Vien are pretty close by. It's too bad that Jessica, YP and Nette are damn far from me.
So anyway, I am sitting in the first row on the left, third table from the front. It's a pretty nice place. I'm satisfied =D I sit right beside the open doors, so I get a cool windy breeze every once in awhile. And of course, I sit so in front so I get to see the huge clock that ticks away the minutes until SPM ends for me =)
Then I got my SPM slip, which I call my SPM receipt because it actually has some price at the bottom. It doesn't look as nice as the one that I got for PMR. And then I got my sijil berhenti too. Nice blue paper. Haha. Ah. With all these official documents presented to me already and a table with my name on it in the MGS hall, all that's left is for me to actually sit for the exam. I'm not feeling stressed now. I've been stressed the whole year, but it's strange how when it actually comes to the moment, I feel an indescribable peace. Now I know that I had to go through all that stress to know that the peace I feel now comes from You and You alone. =] Oh, and before I left the hall today, I turned to my table, tapped it and said, "I'll see you Wednesday. Be nice to me." Haha.
One order of the SPM 2009 exam. RM163.50, please? XD
Effective after 8th December =D
My place for the next four weeks
Study, study, study =)Marchin' On
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For those days we felt like a mistake
Those times when love's what you hate
Somehow, we keep marchin' on
For those nights when I couldn't be there
I've made it harder to know that you know
That somehow, we'll keep movin' on
There's so many wars we fought
There's so many things we're not
But with what we have, I promise you that
We're marchin' on
For all of the plans we've made, there isn't a flag I'd wave
Don't care if we bend, I'd sink us to swim
We're marchin' on
For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know we're not what we've seen
For this dance we'll move with each other
There ain't no step other than one foot right in front of the other
We'll have the days we break
And we'll have the scars to prove it
We'll have the bonds that we save
But we'll have the heart not to lose it
We put one foot in front of the other
We move like we ain't go no other
We go when we go
We're marchin' on
Falling head over heels in love with OneRepublic's latest, Waking Up. Ryan Tedder has got to be my favourite songwriter in the whole world! Haha. Somehow the songs that he writes are just so beautiful. The words he chooses and the way they match each other with the music being the finishing touch. And the one thing that I absolutely love is how he incorporates strings into the music. Yay, strings! Haha. I wish I could write songs like that. Ah... =]
Those times when love's what you hate
Somehow, we keep marchin' on
For those nights when I couldn't be there
I've made it harder to know that you know
That somehow, we'll keep movin' on
There's so many wars we fought
There's so many things we're not
But with what we have, I promise you that
We're marchin' on
For all of the plans we've made, there isn't a flag I'd wave
Don't care if we bend, I'd sink us to swim
We're marchin' on
For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know we're not what we've seen
For this dance we'll move with each other
There ain't no step other than one foot right in front of the other
We'll have the days we break
And we'll have the scars to prove it
We'll have the bonds that we save
But we'll have the heart not to lose it
We put one foot in front of the other
We move like we ain't go no other
We go when we go
We're marchin' on
Falling head over heels in love with OneRepublic's latest, Waking Up. Ryan Tedder has got to be my favourite songwriter in the whole world! Haha. Somehow the songs that he writes are just so beautiful. The words he chooses and the way they match each other with the music being the finishing touch. And the one thing that I absolutely love is how he incorporates strings into the music. Yay, strings! Haha. I wish I could write songs like that. Ah... =]
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